Heres why…

At the LA premiere of Inglourious Basterds, there was Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Diance Kruger, Sarah Silverman, Quentin Tarantino and our very own Mizz M….

As expected, Angie looks nice, I mean she could have done better than this dress from Micheal Kors (who I despise) but since shes A. Jolie, she gets to wear whatever she wants…. i.e. Brad Pitt + anything Black.

Hmm, but I never thought I’d say these words ….

“MOVE OVER ANGIE, COZ hereee comes Mizz M”….!!!

Well folks, hold on to your breath (and other things) …..

Taking away ALL ATTENTION from Angie, Mallika strutted her stuff, showing confidence (God knows where she gets hers from) like a whale in whats-known-as-a-”Gown” designed by Lingerie Giant, Fredericks of Hollywood.

Who the Hell wears Fredericks on the street??? And why did she choose this nasty piece … Oh wait, I know… Mallika is so used to wearing crap from Anita Dongre’s house of NO-style, that this outfit is probably DECENT comparitively!

However for $50 odd bucks, she could have worn the LBD on the left or the one on the right for $29 in case the economy is a reason for keeping wallets closed…

Yes Yessssss its tacky… But ya know what? Its GENIUS too! Now, shes totally GOT the attention of the whole wide world JUST LIKE she wanted…Her marketing skills (i.e. marketing herself) are sooo goddam GOOD that the next time I take one of those classes, I will request her as my proffessor…LOL… Ok maybe not, but you get the point! xoxo

Pics courtesy: http://www.hollywood.com/

So cool is she that shes saving one woman at a time for a cause that can only make me admire her every day. Originally from Karachi, Pakistan, actress and model, Somy Ali moved to Bombay, India where she worked in 10 Hindi films and several commercials…Consequently today after a successful university career, Somy Ali has evolved into a US based human rights advocate and documentary film maker, who is both passionate about educating the public, and working to help solve complex global issues.

…Take a look at this video…

In fact shes channeling her good work through fashion to bring about awareness…with SO-Me Designs, a Socially Conscious Clothing company. FINALLY!!

I would encourage you to PLEASE check out So-MeDesigns.com and look at their new collection…IT IS COOL. No Doubt.

Shes got all kindsa designs: SO-Him, So-Her, So-Green and the cutest one of ALL … The SO-Cute designs!! OMG… They really make for my ‘Trends of the month”!

http://www.so-medesigns.com/so-me/details.php?pid=HUMAN BEING - RED

“We have new issues with new designs. As you know, a percentage of each sale from So-Me goes to No More Tears” Says Somy who is a gem of a human being…(cant mention it enough, really)

So, do your thing peeps, lets support… Heres their FaceBook Group.  Its time for No More Tears….xoxo

—————————————————————————————

No More Tears was a brainchild of Ms. Somy Ali. After living in a world of glitz and glamour, she decided to leave everything to complete her education. During this time, she realized that she must do something about the many injustices she had seen in her life.
To learn more about No More Tears, please visit: www.NMTproject.org

One word: TATOO !!

They look HOT on people who live on Planet Pluto. Full stop. No Arguments. Here on Earth, the only exception to the rule is David Beckham. Ok Angelina too…. BUT THATS IT. Total Full stop.

I will admit, its *sort of cute* when celeb couples ink themselves …. in Bollyland, its totally OKAYYYYYYYY ….Check it out… Hrithik and Suzanne with their “his” and “hers” inkings…  We will count Saif’s Kareena stamp OUT of this since 1) they are not officially married and 2) its old news 

So far so good… But then, this horrendous (BELOW) Tragedy strikes….

A wannabe Angelina is SOoooo UN-COOL !! PS: Where is Esha Deol these days anyways??!!?? … Dont know, Dont Care…

Sadly, this trend doesnt stop here …. What could be worse than this?? Worry not, for I’m here to enlighten u loving souls…

When (in what looks like a totally desperate attempt to win wifey back) Greek God, Hrithik Roshan gets inked with a tramp-stamp I absolutely dont know what to say… For one, I CANT go on telling people that he & I share the same Bday anymore… Yes, Jan 10… Here I thought our bday story was soooooooooo cool… but after this horrendous act of ink-ery, I totally will be ignoring that he shares anything decent with me…

Whats the point of proving something with ink when you can do the same thing by….. ummm lets see……sending flowers maybe?? *just a thought*

HOWEVER, theres a bright side to Roshan ….YAY!! …. He brings us a fabulous trend… The Trend that I sooo love right now… The suit with a scarf… HOTNESS!!

Isnt his cool ‘TUDE and casual look totally HOT??? And add to that the scarf / wrap is even HOTTER???????        

A little perspective: While the Ash Bachchan’s and the Barbara Mori’s were sporting the Oh-SO-PREDICTABLE Roberto Cavalli (not surprising) at Cannes, KUDOS to Hritik Roshan for being styled by Anaita Shroff Adajania (right) … Remember that chic girlfriend of Kajol’s in DDLJ??? Sheena, who always attends Robby’s parties??? LOL… Yup thats her!! … Way to go!! I guess only Duggu can REALLY do JUSTICE to the Desi stylist on that red carpet…!

Props to him for not going all label crazy … and promoting our desi stylist Anaita at an international Red Carpet…REALLY

Back to the delish trend of wearing a suit with a wrap that I adore… And I adore it for a reason…

Recently, Beckham stepped out in Milan bringing the trend Absolutely to the FOREFRONT….where it belongs. 

Anyways, here is the video…Check out Roshan’s tux here and hes totally cheering Anaita…

Well, so much for the same dude setting great trends and then falling for the lamest ones …Eh what can you do?? U win some, U loose some…XOXO

When I was growing up, not too long ago (lol), Sridevi & Madhuri were the “IT” girls…

The job description the 80s actress: Add on fake lashes, dress up, sing and dance and occasionally look HOT ala Dhak Dhak Karne Laga….

The actress was required to be just that… An Actress…and occasionally a Star.

However we human beings evolve. And according to the Father of DesiLand (Uncle Gandhi) “The only thing permanent is Change”.

Bollyland may not realize that change is here but thank the heavens that it is… Actresses are no longer just actresses… They have put their talents to multiple use. By that, I dont mean, multiple dress changes or multiple Boyfriend changes (Think Deepika Padukone…Sorry KB, I know u luv her but she luvs her men and thats how it is!)

Shruti, Hard Kaur, Anushka in Verve

Here is the new job description of a Bollyland actress:

Sing Rock/Pop/Anything to show some , Model, Must have blog / Twitter/ Facebook profile hacked at least once (Sonam Kapoor)

This new chick should be able to potentially mold and wield her talent to many a thing apart from looking good in a hindi flick.

Sooooo….. Introducing the newest chic to head the Bollyland band of Rock-tresses:

Shruti Hassan - Kamal Hassan’s daughter is a rock star turned actress. She sings for her movie Luck.

Sorry to compare, but this young and happening Bollyland chick is definitely following the footsteps of Hollywood counterparts like Lindsay Lohan, Gossip Girl hottie Leighton Meester who plays ‘Blair Waldorf’ (Worship the Ground she walks on) and Hillary Duff who have NOT LIMITED their talents to 15 mins of dialogue-giri in movies…

Anushka is also trying her hand at multi-tasking but more on her next time..

Heres a list of Hollywood Rock-tresses:

Lindsay Lohan

Mandy Moore

Miley Cyrus, Scarlett Johanson, Fergie, Beyonce Knowles, Jen Hudson, Amanda Bynes …. U get the picture…

Dont get me wrong, the older gen also tried their hands in Rock-tressing and you’d be surprised to see our Bollyland antiques on this list too….

Jennifer Lopez

Raageshwari

Queen Latifah

Urmila Matondkar

Tanya Kumar

U may also consider Madhuri Dixit (if her contribution in Devdas counts) and Sridevi (if her squeeky voice in Chandni works for you)

BTW… For my Fashionista friends…

Shruti Hassan in Luck

Bikini Spotting: Shruti is wearing a BEBE Bikini which is apparently embellished by designer Binal Shah.

Check out Eva Longoria in BEBE Swim wear too…

Eva Longoria in BEBE Swimwear

So heres to our desi Rock-tresses….who arent afraid to diversify and show us their REAL talent…!!

Shruti’s Video is pretty cool…Good stuff eh… xoxo

Raju Sethi, AVS TV & Akshay Kumar

Bottom line: He aint all that..He’s All that ANDDD much more… The man’s 300% professionalism really wasn’t short of IMPRESSIVE…. You just had to be there to witness his charms and style!! Listen now, I have only good things to say about Akshay Kumar in 2009….so bear with me…

Akshay Kumar for AVS TV

Dressed down in a hot pair of  Diesels and yellow LV loafers (definitely hotter than a summer-y Saturday afternoon …), a few blocks from Central Park, he went on & on about how his wife styles his appearances to create the “I–Don’t–Play–Games … I–AM–THE–GAME”  look! ….. So Slick!!! Stylish is a word that I wouldn’t have used on him during his Khiladi days but I think the transformation this dudes gone through merits the title FO’ SURE.

Look at the comparison below… Then & Now!

Akshay Kumar in Khiladi

Akshay & Twinkle Kumar @ IIFA

Although he gives complete credit to wife and her stylish sensibilities I have a sneaky feeling there is more than meets the eye… Granted Twinkle Khanna wasnt the epitome of style in her first few appearances in Bollyland… But she’s definitely coming into her own now as well… So the underlying fact remains that this couple has hired a pretty sensible stylist… and for that matter, an Aussie personal trainer (Jennifer)…. I guess gone are those macho-muscle days and thank the heavens for that… Akkis never looked leaner and wifeys getting her jaw line from somewhere for sure… Good for them, I Say!!

Sherina Kapany, AVS TV & Akshay Kumar

I  will leave you with one insightful detail. Akshay Kumar is a real gentleman. His persona, his posture, his body language towards women are beyooooond belief … And even though he sells as prince-not-so-charming with the numerous affairs under his belt, this man has transformed into Prince-TOTALLY-Charming….

Well, at least he tries….And if that aint Kambakkth of him, I dunno what is…xoxo

OMG, so… back in March, we celebrated 22 long years of AVS TV… Yes, we ARE going strong and we WILL live long!

But whats fascinating is our promo has totally inspired Saif Ali Khan’s production house and Eros Entertainment… right from the intro’s and straight to the “T” (une) … !!!

NOW we agree, the promo of Twist looks damn neat …. and it DEFINITELY IS a twist to OUR promo … check it out…

Well, we raise a toast then … to Super Smart Public Relations… and…
Cheers to Dancing to the same tunes

But whatever it may be, one thing IS obvious : This movie is catering SOLELY to the NRI audience in LA, Milan, London, Sydney, NYC and Paris… The fashion is so UBER CHIC…Totally HIGH-END…and it seems like the producers  must have gone BANKRUPT…In fact I’m sure of it….AND I luuuuuv it…. LOL….

Here’s a very obvious observation: The thing with a sleek woman is that she could potentially carry off any look… Ever seen Victoria Beckham ?? … If there is something that Kareena does well… it is copying her idol, the very POSH Mrs Beckham….

Victoria Beckham does, among other things, very high end fashion. Shes seen sporting the hottest trends around the world and is a perm fixture at front rows…. Unfortunately, Frieda Pinto got to sit front row at Chanel and Dolce and Gabbana like Vickky B and not Kareena but you see there are some things the size zero doesn’t guarantee….

Frieda Pinto at Dolce G's front row

Victoria Beckham, front row

However I am quite impressed with stylists … The buzz is that most of Kareena’s looks have been styled by a very famous Hollywood A-listers personal assistant…AND…the desi Akki Narula….AND then there is Ashley Robello (AND I’m sure many more will come to claim their steak…lol)

How awesome is the fact that they are no longer catering to the Kitty-Party-Aunties …  Let me elaborate: Women who may be classified as India’s Desperate Housewives, who lunch at the poshest restaurants, who gossip and who wear only GUCCI and LV because They CAN (and really, those are probably the ONLY 2 brands they know)…. Who have kids competing with their friend’s kids and who call themselves “Ladies who Lunch”…. For a reason… coz what else would they do??

Kitty Party Aunties :)

Kitty Party Aunties :)

So these stylists have now transcended from using the usual labels like the ones used in Kal ho na ho and Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum (and God knows what other K-jo Movies) to… using LABELS that are totally unknown to the common (wo) man in India …I.E. Stella McCartney, Issey Miyake, Micheal Kors, Valentino, Emilio Pucci, YSL Rive Gauche, Just Cavalli, Roberto Cavalli, Marc Jacobs, and ofcorse Diane von Furstenberg… Paris Hilton wore it first!!

Paris Hilton in DVF

And here is the PRADA clutch (a different version) that you see Akshay clutching so mercilessly from Kareena… And I forgive him (see video at 35 seconds)

I know you & I know these brands…but think of that uncle who spends about Rs 200 to buy a ticket to the movie, sitting in Galaxy theatres in Bandra, with his Bata shoes and Tommy Hilfiger Shirt….Does he know what Kareena is wearing? Does his wife who is probably a regular housewife who dreams of maybe… i dunno know… lemme see…. Manish Malhotra, does she know of Stella?

The point is that Kambakkth Ishq is probably their Rs 200 trip to Venice, since a few scenes look great in that song Lakh Lakh… and thats pretty much it…. while Kareena and Best-Tag-along-for-free-friend Amrita Arora get to live their dream lives as young fashionistas and probably even KEEP the goodies!!

I mean we all know Kareena takes her work seriously i.e. copying every look that Victoria Beckham has…. And young indian girls like me in NYC absolutely applaud the effort….1) for totally wanting to be Mrs B and 2) for making Kambakkth Ishq her opportunity to do just THAT !!

So…. there you have it….Kambakkth Ishq - Bollyland Fantasy for young & the fashionably advanced… xoxo…

I can’t help but wonder when Bollyland flees Mumbai who is watching over my most favorite island? Mumbai has been deserted….but only for a weekend! That’s right; IIFA has managed to transport our Bollyworld to the Venetian in Macau for a supposedly rocking 3 days…

Ventian in Macau

Amitabh Bachchan unveiling People Mag @ IIFA 2009

Apparently, IIFA is committed to “taking Indian cinema to the rest of the world”…How cool!??? But wait, didn’t Danny Boyle do that? Or maybe it was Akshay Kumar’s duet with Snoop? U might question, hasn’t Yash Raj Films done that for so many years? I might question, haven’t we?? I mean AVS is totally bringing Bollyland to North America, Australia and now Europe…FOR 22 long YEARS!!! On a side note, People mag is a snoozing because AVS TV already did the 40-years-of- B-a-c-h-c-h-a-n special last month <u snoooze, u looooze>

Hmm interestingly, heres a few reasons why IIFA truly does take it to a whole new level… For one, they are mixing pleasure with BUSINESS… The discussion on the Global financial meltdown with corporate giants from the Orient is apparently going to reinforce That--Heartwarming--Hindi—Chini—Bhai—Bhai—Goooey—Feeling… Awwww, how nice… I’m just hoping that doesn’t mean we will be seeing more of Jackie Chan & Mallika ?! LOL…

Also looking out for the environment, our Bollyland is letting Panasonic take the responsibility of protecting the environment… Eco Ideas are the rage in Macau for this weekend… But why just this weekend? Shouldn’t it be applicable ALL the time??!! Well, I guess the GREEN Carpet at IIFA will bring this issue to the world platform EVEN if it means being sponsored heavily by an electronics company <Hmmm> … PS: Props to Preity Zinta who back in the day, really took the Clean-Mumbai-Green-Mumbai initiative seriously!

Here’s a cute little item on the agenda: IDEA showcasing mobile technology ETC ETC ETC… blah blah blah… every event needs these CUTESY things… like we have socialites here in NYC doing all these various balls trying to SAVE VENICE or Jennifer Aniston’s DYING CAREER… they plug the same agendas with similar sponsors… Been There Done That…. No, seriously…With a background in the Telecom industry, I guarantee you that Mobile Technology is the order of the day AND can only be fully utilized WHEN merged with Entertainment… So if Bollyland is waking up to the fact, then it’s about time coz Hollywood is like 50 yrs ahead in the game…

MOVING ON to MY favorite part of the event – the FASHION extravaganza… And the first thing that comes to mind is Rocky S… Also synonymous with “I-R-R-E-L-E-V-A-N-T” …On second thoughts, maybe not since IT SEEMS LIKE he’s really good at bringing inventory from china and adding his labels…so IIFA probably IS his best excuse to fortify business relations with China! HA!!

The fashion segment is kinda cool with Manav Gangwani (Love his creations) and Farah Ali Khan blinging all the way… She really is the Queen of Bling Bling… well, for one, Queenie Dhody apparently lost her glory with the divorce & cheating & all that high society Jaazzz… And now with Sheetal Mafatlal in the SLAMMER, I guess Bollylands Bling Queen status is Set IN Stone <no pun intended> for Farah.

Take a look at the latest at IIFA 2009…Whatever you say, Bollywood is finally back with an IIFA-tic Bang! An even if it is on the tiny island of Macau (& Not Mumbai), All’s well that Ends well!! xoxo

Bachchan with his security @ IIFA, 2009

Govinda arrives at venetian, IIFA 2009

Ritesh Deshmukh, Lara Dutta, Boman Irani to host IIFA 2009

Peter Andre with 2 "Mysterious girls", IIFA 2009

Sophie Chaudhary with Ramesh Sippy, IIFA 2009

IIFA Awards 2009

….And…Ladies & Gentlemen…here is the original ….

Here’s what I’m thinking….”Please Mr Bappi Lahiri, Pleaseeeee UN BREAK MY goddam HEART by pulling ur video off the market coz once Mizz Tony Braxton finds out, U are going Dowwwwn my friend and I dont mean the land down under where u shot this home-vid…She will be raining lawsuits & You WILL be pawning all of your gold chains and much more to settle that crazy ride… It might make you loose a ton of that lard as well … Thank you very much”….

Bappi’s video is soooo poorly shot that the pictures from my blackberry look better…Here are the pics from my Trip to Sydney…really, my silly phone camera pics look amazing compare to this bollyland home video… Then again, there ain’t no comparison… HA!

Sherina in Sydney (right)

Sydney pics from my Blackberry

U see what I mean????

Like,  back in the day this music-composer--turned--music-rip-off dude churned out what was considered reasonable tune-age….

….. But seems like Bappi DAAAA (or whatever else you may wanna call him, be my guest) lost his talent a long time ago but this totally confirms that hes lost his mind too! GIGGLESSS…xoxo

PS: Check out more of his desperateness…